30 June 2007

the power of words...and the vulnerability of love

It's amazing how much power words have. One single word or comment has the power to make or break your day/heart/will/mood. I was reminded of that 2 days ago while I was at work. I was just finishing up with a client, and the mom, who is a complete stranger, looks at me just before they leave the room and says, "you have the most beautiful eyes", I was a little stunned, and replied "thanks, I guess I got them from my mom". For the rest of the day I felt so good inside. One little sentence from a stranger and my day was just that much brighter.

I think that I sometimes forget how much my words can effect people. I remember being teased fairly regularly in grade 7 by a group of boys in grade 9. They used to follow me home from school, teasing me about my weight and calling me names. Even when they moved on to high school they continued to do this anytime that they saw me crossing the field. I have never been able to get those words out of my head, it's literally been 15 years and I still carry around the scars that those words inflicted. I realize that I can sometimes have a biting sense of humor, but I also realize that I need to carefully consider even the words I say in jest, because the person on the receiving end may not be in a place to handle those words.

The power of words, they are one of the most potent weapons in our relational arsenal, if we're not careful with them. Through God's grace I need to be better at making sure the words that come out of my mouth are more uplifting, honest, and kind sometimes. Because, as I was reminded of so beautifully this week, a few nice words can change someone's whole outlook on the day.

The other thing that I've been thinking about a lot is love, the kind of love that Myron was talking about in his sermon last sunday, agape love, the love that we are supposed to have for each other as a family of believers. I do love to care about people, I like to take care of people, I like to make sure that people know they have someone caring about them, and when I see friends in trouble, lost, searching, or struggling it breaks my heart. However, I tend to, as Joel puts it "care too much about people and end up getting used and broken". I'm pretty passionate in my relationships, I care deeply, and my love language is definitely serving people. This tends to make it exceptionally easy for me to get taken advantage of. I think that it gets misread too. I have definitely been hurt because I've loved. But what is the alternative, to pretend that I don't have a heart? Pretend that I don't care? Live life without getting hurt and being vulnerable and miss out on what God has created life to be? IT'S ALL ABOUT LOVE!! The whole of human history and future is about the passionate love that God has for us and that He wants us to have for each other. I came across a quote from C.S. Lewis recently that says what I'm trying to say much more eloquently:

“Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

To love is to be vulnerable, to be hurt sometimes, to look like an idiot. However is it worth locking my heart up and never knowing the fullness of what God intended human relationship to be? I think not. So I'll get hurt, be humiliated, be rejected, and be mocked but Jesus suffered through all of that and more to show me how much He loved me so I think that I'll survive.

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